Reaching out, helping many.

让我先求神的国和义　不分彼此　同心向前行

I'm preparing for the coming praise and worship for Famine-30. wow, Lord. Just how much you have taught me all these, just by listening to your hymns and words. Feeling rather complicated inside. Things that needed to be done is scattered all around. Breath in, breath out. Hearing only the fan spinning, wind blowing and hymns twirling, filling the atmosphere in the room. 

This feelings i had, how i wish i can capture it and store it for everyday use. At times, we often forget how God touches our life. That particular time, is always when we are tired, things doesnt go right, we fall, we cry, we get hurt and when the ache inside our heart didnt go away. That's when we ask for prayers, we kneel down and let go of the pride inside. The pride that we hold on and saying we are strong. Truth is, we cant be strong without Him. I know this feelings that im saying sounds surreal. But no dear friends, im telling you this is real. The holy spirit that captivates my soul is real. The power God, He installs in our heart is real. I want to reach out, helping many. Cause i know, this is the best best gift that we could ever have.

I remember i said, i wish we could all go to heaven together one day. I really wish we all could. I wish you and all of you were with me during judgement day. I really really hope you understand what i'm telling you and think about it please. Give your heart some space and think about it by heart. It surprised me when i realised i wasnt sad when i tell you all these. I was feeling rather eager or enthusiastic. I have a feeling i believe yes, God will hear my prayer one day and that day will definitely come. I'll keep on praying, never cease praying. 

好吗?

他说.. 他说.. 我们只是一群自我安慰的小孩子...

此刻的我，深深能够体会到珠珠的感受. 有了自己的朋友圈，在教会越来越热心事奉，教会占了我生活中的大半时间，感觉上我和神的关系越靠越进. 只是当我再次遇到他，我才发现我错了.

一直以来以为什么问题都没有，突然之间好想知道大家眼里的团契是什么样子的. 很多时候我们都忘记了生命是需要别人一同参与，一同分享的. 当你试着去理解他人，进入他们的生命的时候，你会知道没有一个人是正常的. 想想，耶稣怎么爱祂周围的人? 耶稣不是只在犹太人的会堂里祷告，也不是只在旷野当一个只会祷告的隐士.祂是和人们生活在一起，开心欢乐的时候，大家一同欢乐，伤心难过的时候，遇到困难的时候，大家一同伤心，一同担当.

我想说... 对不起我没能明白你的故事. 没能当一个好姐妹，好家人，只忙着自己的事，没能和你分担你的困难. 我想我们都有自己的一根刺隐藏着吧? 不让别人知道，也就不会受伤害. 但这样是行不通的. 人不是孤单的受造物. 我们都需要朋友, 请再给我一个机会，让我成为你的朋友，你在团契里的家人， 好吗?

背十架的女孩

Store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Matt:6:20)

An innocent little girl, loved by family and friends, experiences life maybe more than anyone else could have. Her name is Jacklyn Wong. 黄慈恩. She had a brain tumour in 2008. She was only 10. It was a blessing i get to know her sisters, Joan Wong and Joyce Wong here in penang, who both are staying very strong in Christ as well. I only get to know about these when i came across her stories in church.

What a 10 year old girl can do during her time is playing barbie doll, running around the park and make a lot of new friends. But this little girl, this sweet little girl, she went through chemo, staying strong in health and spiritually, praying and keep praying to God, having faith that God provides her strength and courage to live another day. The love from her family brings me to tears. The letter her dad wrote for her is really heartbreaking. Watching the whole process of Jacklyn enduring the pain and suffering is ripping everyone's heart. But watching her being so strong in Christ, showing her testimony of having a delighted heart even though her days were numbered deeply reminds us of how life we should be living in. 

Through the life of Jacklyn, God let us see His mercy and love. Through the suffering she endured, God let those people who mourn be glad, and through the pain she had, the smile she put on, and the experiences that maybe we would never had, brings faith, hope and love to all the people around her. She's a treasure. A treasure from God to her family, relatives, friends and even to acquaintances who comes to faith with Jesus Christ. 

The video of her life experiences: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXCvFpSfu08 

Her blog: http://jacklynwongcien.blogspot.com

3rd, be with you.

I was wearing blue uniform and you were wearing a white jacket. We were having sunday school and we happened to be in the same group. That's the first time i met you? in church. I remember you flashed me a smile when we make an eye contact. You happened to be the most devout and lovely man ive met at that time. Everything happened naturally. We talked about me, you, our family, God, literally everything. You became my very best friend. And on that very special day, 10/10 we decided to make a devotion in us.

I was a blur queen. Knowing nothing about love and relationships. It was first love. I have this thing on love. That i wanted my first love to last forever, that i believe God will pull me to that right one to say yes. I couldnt say we had a perfect and godly relationship. We have flaws. Instead, at times we see a lot of imperfections between us. Human's emotions and feelings will cross over and we sometimes would forget God is there. But every fight we had, always reminds me to cherish you more, to learn even better and to love you harder.

How fast the time flies, it has been three years. Three long years i would say, to take time to understand each other a little bit better, to improve to be the one that God wants us to be, and to learn to be the one that we want each other to be. I cant really remember all the details we had. But three years that you've spent with me, is the greatest gift. Time and effort that you put on this relationship, shows love and proves everything. And that little improvement between us deserve a clap. I don know how many years ahead to come, 10 years? 30 years? 50 years? How would we become? What will we be doing? God's speed. For what's significant is the present, the moment to spent with you.

You have been a very loving boyfriend. You flew back from kl just to celebrate my birthday. You remember all the dates even when i forget. You spent a lot of money on gifts and surprises. You tolerate with my temper and silly thoughts. You sweet talk me even when i shoot you with nasty words. You sing for me when i asked you to. You do things when i needed you to. You share with me all your deep thoughts. You bring me back home to meet your parents and family. You teach me a lot about God, about us. Most importantly, you love me when i don even love myself.

Dearest Lemuel,

Long distance relationships are hard. We've been through that and are going through it again. There are many reasons to fight, to cry and to break up. But distance also gives us the reason to love more than any other couple should. We put our entire beings into this relationship and although we may not hold hands as often or hug as often, we will never take those things for granted. Each touch is special, each kiss is cherished. We may be separated by space and time, but the bond between us that will push through the hard times will be the strongest. There may be miles in between, but there is no one closer, other than you.

Love takes time, nourishment, and most importantly combine effort from each other. Let's grow love together. <3

words to share

I love sharing. But i love to listen to sharings even more. Listening to people sharing their experiences and personal encounter with God, that how our Heavenly Father has changed their life never fails to give me a life lesson.

One night, the three of us, a cozy cafe, drinking and eating good food, and we started chatting about everything. From the general opening of how are you to little details about our own family. We barely even paused for a minute. We even had our tears rolling down our cheeks at the end of the night. We feel for each other and encourage each other to stay stronger. Understanding each other is a life long learning processes, but having the mutual understanding and concern is a gift from God. 

When your friends are concern about you, asking you questions on how you are living, you don take it for granted. When your friends are telling you stories about her assignments and maybe her lovely dovely boyfriend, you let her finish. You need a friend, and a friend needs you too. All you have in a friendship will be the connection between you two. I remember there's this girl who always would call me up whenever she feels sad and last week, while i was on bus feeling really blue too when she called. Both of us were laughing at ourselves and i cried on the bus! I don really mind about the crying tho, in fact i feel good after i talked and this young lady is who i have to thank to. 

I read too. People and pages posting up status on facebook and friends app me with all the bible verses truly help in making me grow. Even at times when i didnt even reply a thank you, i still can see words of encouragement flowing in my inbox. Thank you and you. 

Friendship grows by sharing. Same goes to life. I learned, by hearing stories from all these great people surviving in this world with the strength given by God. Let's remember the good thing God has done and let faith fill your heart. Forever and always. 

Love like Jesus

He who covers and forgives an offense seeks love, but he who repeats or harps on a matter separates even close friends. Proverbs 17:9

I happened to read this verse and felt it. I have a few close friends. I love how our relationships are. We were all primary and secondary school friends. It is like we have known each other for our entire life. I love my churchmates as well. Theyre all very loving and caring. They were there to watch me grow spiritually day by day. I love uni friends too, to get to know different people all over the places, to understand each other throughout our uni life. I really am grateful. I thank God, these people that walked into my life, never left. Even when we are all at a different countries, different time zone, we keep in touch once in a while and talked about every part of our lives.

Me and my close friends, of course we do fight, we do tear our faces and shouted nasty things about each other. But eventually, we grew, and learn how to love! Isnt that amazing. That is what keeping them all around me till today.

Love can easily turn into hatred. When you don love from the bottom of your heart, when you don love like how Jesus loves us. In only a split second of your anger and emotions, your so called love can changed into jealousy, complaints and anger. Humans tend to sin like this. It is like you're stepping on a huge cliff, if you happen to take another step without thinking, you'll fall off hurting yourself, hurting people who truly loves you.

Love can covers. It means you don take in offenses and make a revenge out of it. God doesnt do that. God's love covers us, He forgives us. It doesnt mean that you ignore all the faults that have been done. It simply means, you don outraged yourself, pause for a sec to think what Jesus would do at that very moment!

To think how great how deep how high how wide! is God's love, never stops to amaze me.